Still thrilled.

I GOT MY SUMMER offer a week and four hours ago and I'm still absurdly happy about it. When I was pounding the pavement looking for an internship, a sense of dread would wash over me a couple times a day. Now, I'll be walking between classes and my mind will switch into recruiting mode, thinking about what I need to do, or who I need to call. And then it will hit me that I don't need to think about that anymore. My heart will swell a little and I'll smile. If it hits me while I'm standing waiting for the subway listening to music, I'll realize that I'm shaking my ass just a little to the beat.

It's weird to be this happy about something that you know is going to be really tough, something that's going to gobble up your personal life and be a source of stress in the future. But for now I'm trying not to think about that, and focusing on feeling like this:

Dooce - Leta Learns to Splash

splashing in the tub from dooce on Vimeo.
Next up, insanely cute puppies.

[Via Dooce]

Secret lovers, that's what we are

MY FORMER CUBEMATE AND I were obsessed with that T-Mobile MyFives commercial, the one where one guy says to the other guy, "Dude, what's my girlfriend doing in your five?" And then the other guy tries to play if off like it's nothing, but then the girlfriend calls and the ringer is that song "Secret Lovers."

HaHa! Hilarious! Oh man, and then we'd just laugh and laugh...

Alright, so it's not that funny to recount, but when you're at work the bar is lower.

Anyway, M, this is for you.

Tato Salad - "Cell Phone Five"

"The older the prune, the sweeter the poon."

In which I love down Maya Rudolph

I HAVE A GROWING OBSESSION with SNL's Maya Rudolph. She did this sketch as Donatella Versace selling a new, high-class version of Hot Pockets called Versace Pockets. It's fall out of your chair funny. Matt Damon is also in the sketch as Axl Rose, and now every time I go to microwave something, I wail, "You know what you are! You're going into the microwave, baby!" which, let me tell you, makes for a fun workplace environment.

Unfortunately, I can't find it on the Tube anyplace. Check it out here.

Maya also does a great Whitney Houston. In the season finale of SNL, they had fun with those new Geico commercials where the celebrity tells the real person's story, and she did her Whitney. Later in the show, "Whitney" popped into the Weekend Update to share some special "summretime" brownies with Amy and Seth. And now I'm sharing them with you. Pay it forward.

SNL - Whitney Houston stops by Weekend Update

"It's gonna be a messALRIGHT!"

In which I decide to always wear khakis

MY COMPANY, like many, has Jeans Casual on Fridays when we don’t have clients in the building. They will occasionally give us Jeans Casual as a special treat on other days, like the days between Christmas and New Years for the poor suckers trapped in the office while the other poor suckers are trapped with their families.

I will occasionally give myself an unsanctioned Jeans Casual Friday. I’m not really one for breaking the rules, so giving myself Jeans Casual is my way of sticking it to The Man. I feel anxious every time I do it. I feel the way I imagine people at the Boston Tea Party would have felt, only they were dressed as Indians, and I’m a denim-wearing pansy.

Normally, my minor rebellion goes unnoticed – just the way I like it – but today was different.

As I step into the elevator this morning, who do I run into but our company’s CEO. He is not, I should mention, wearing jeans. I look from him, to my pants, back to him, and then try to slide inconspicuously beside him. I then do what everyone does instinctually in elevators: I stare up at the floor number display.

Silence. I exhale. This is going to be fine.

“It’s cold today, huh?” he says.

I panic. What is he implying? That I’m wearing jeans because it’s cold? I look over at him.

“Yeah. But I like it,” I respond. Great. Good job. Don’t say anything stupid. Pause. But what if he hates the cold? Normally, in that situation, I go on to say that I like cold weather because I went to school in New Hampshire. Thick blood and all that shit. But because my mind is so preoccupied thinking about my bedenimed legs, the 10% still focusing on the actual conversation decides that the whole school thing would be far too complicated.

“I’m from Canada,” I blurt out.

No you’re not! You’re from Connecticut! Why are you lying? Abort conversation! At this point, the panic has grasped my brain in a death-like vice, and I start imagining a conversation between my CEO, my boss and me. In this imagined conversation, my CEO brings up the fact that I’m from Canada, my boss looks confused. The truth comes out. I’m shamed. It’s horrible. I’m sweating.

“Really? My family has a house in Vermont,” he says, “right on the border. Beautiful country.”

“Yeah,” I say. My mind is totally blank. “Yeah, but Vermont’s not Canada.”

Nice job, asshole!

“That’s true,” he says.

Silence. The doors slide open.

“Well, uh, this is my floor,” I say. “Have a nice day.”

KILL SELF.